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Met this guy, had a few ambers, a coupla giggies. He had a maniacal laugh when chats got good and had recently been badly bashed by threes dickheads, wearing Aussie rugby league blazers. Has a steal plate in his face now. Beautiful stuff. He seemed to think that people create a load a drama that they just don’t need.
Whatzz-that?
That we spend all our time on, “emotional blackmail. I just haven’t got the time for it!” he says and that’s the bulldust we give to each other to cause each other grief. It’s an attempt to force each other into positions we wouldn’t perhaps already occupy.
But the problem is nobody, NOBODY, likes to be forced to do things, nobody…
“That’s not how you make porridge!”
When it’s all broken down, the bulldust and troubles with others and the there abouts, we just got the bullshite that is emotional blackmail and that creates the drama. And it’s as simple as that. We love the drama, ‘cos what else is there to tell our friends? What else is there to talk about? What else breaks the monotony of a regular work life? So we make the drama? We hunt for the drama, we cry and fight and scheme and push on with the drama. The stories of ups and downs of our own life, desperately avoiding the stability, the endless capacity for love and getting stuff done, clouding the unique simplicity of the truth with a million and one grabs at something else we don’t have, forgetting to enjoy what we do have and learning to trust we can make more of the good. There is more to it, but… I’m thinking there’s something in it.
I met this guy, my friends, had a few ambers, a coupla giggies, and this one goes out to the one I love, if only she knew and knew how…
11 comments:
Who? Could this be? Oh, I doubt it...
I ask you what though, if ones drama is focused upon those we come to love, the love gets hurt, does it not?
Someone once said, "If we stop falling more in love, then we start falling out of love."
And that, I put to you, is secret of love. When we feel sad for our lost love, (and who wants that and who hasn’t had it?) we needn't of looked any further then what we did to disrespect our lover. What we did that didn't consider their feelings. But if they cannot look at their own feelings in a healthy manor and can only explode, letting off steam, as you say or engaging in wild humiliating affairs, trying to get away with it and they rarely ever ever do, (I can tell my lover has had a fling from the other side of town), we only kill the love that lays underneath, and that is why two people get together in the first place.
If we use our little, letting off of mental steam in ways that show open disrespect
for our lovers or friends, then we are being hurtful lovers and friends and who wants to put up with that?
Isn't respect for loved ones the most important thing about loved ones?
A better way of letting off steam could be to talk about what is affecting us so that
the important people concerned can understand us (oh, we have to give trust to get it) and together something may be done about it.
You would find the steam gets let off, everybody important understands what is up, a solution can be found, and work can get done and all can be happy-passion-ville full of complex people who understand and care for each other, and give each other what they need and perhaps pop out a couple of mini-mees…
This way the hurt can be dealt with in a controlled fashion, out of love, respect and compassion for each other, people can get it together to solve the ever spinning spin of the world, and adapt to that inevitable change, together!!
If this isn't done, usually the steam just builds up to a blowing point where good things built get broken and nothing can be built... And we all become lonely losers in love, just because we forgot to give the love!!
I agree. And that way everybody can learn more about each other, grow closer and give more to the people who count.
It's only really by communicating that things are ever truely understood.
But it takes courage and some wisdom to share ourself in the right way.
If we go into denyal about our feelings and not express them then, "pop goes the emotional boiler!"
And then people suffer when they never needed to...
Cont of AAA said 1st…Each to their own kind of drama,
for often through conflict we find new ways of viewing things. New ways of seeing. We can be pitted up against our selves as well as others, to see the mettle we are truly made of. Or as Willie Shookspheare wrote,
“Rightly to be great, is not to stir without great argument,
But greatly to find quarrel in a straw
When honour’s at the stake.” Hamlet ACT IV, Scene V.
Yet how great could one be if all they can ever do is seek counsel in all others and never in the one they choose to spend all their time with? Oh we play, yet our play does hurt us
In reply to AAA 2nd.
Yes of course another can know us, if we only let them.
And what great, rare and most valuable love then, we will find and cherish.
Knowing our self is not completely an absolute, or an end so much onto itself,
as there are many things, one would hope, to be discovered, new challenges to face,
but my hunch is that we do get to know so much that we may fulfil our wildest dreams and potentials.
We may find what we are truly meant to do and be.
And yes again, I agree, it does take a lifetime, life itself is always changing,
such is the nature of life, one must beget the wisdom though time to recognise what we can change,
of ourselves, from what we can't.
We have to see what we are doing to ourselves, for good and bad.
We are here in an attempt to fulfil our true potential.
We are all so different, in different ways.
I for one, know what I know, don't know what I don't know, yet want to find more of this.
I have to fix what I find difficult, and make use of what I find easy.
It is a beautiful yet complex equation, but not as daunting as one may think, I do think
and it is such a great pleasure and rids us of cancers!!
Also, I think, a great and genuine peace may be found.
Oh and to share this with another, is a fabulous bliss!!
And the power to be gained here is the greatest power of all.
It is hard for dreamers to know themselves, yet I feel that for dreamers to know themselves,
and to be real, and yet still dream, they can achieve the most wondrous and fantastic things…
I must say, AAA, it is a pleasure to have you with us. Thank-you for joining.
I hear the calls of Adoph and see the burning of books...
Yes, yes, yes, it is really comforting to share inner thoughts; it can take the world off of our shoulders. But especially when shared with someone who listens calmly, non-judgementally and displays to us caring, empathy, compassion, integrity, honesty and real trust.
There is so many people with so much wisdom. It is sometimes hard to know which is the wisdom, which is the fallacy but yes, it can be shared in a relaxed, enjoyable and happy way…
Thank god and amen for that!!
hehe.
I take a bow and hold your hand, now please, listen to this once and for all, you all…
My only motivation is that I care and this should be appreciated. No one reads this stuff anyway. And if they do, I for one am not running around bitching to others, ok. This is most unfortunately your methods. I cherish my love life. They know not who we are. But I would very much appreciate the same courtesy, even though I know it is a bit late for that, think about what you have done! We had something, we shouldn't disrespect ourselves by disrespecting this, it can only hurt us and we deserve better. It is up to us to make it better! It is important. I agree this is somewhat potentially too public, it is also, about many many people. I am sorry for our altercations. We should best meet to maturely and sensibly solve them, but I know this can be difficult for some people. I believe it would make all of us much happier and we would all gain much…
We do share inner thoughts or at least many people do. Those who know they have it and are not afraid, confused or soft inside.
Very best site. Keep working. Will return in the near future.
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On "hiding insecurities felt," yes, but who wants insecurities? If lovers talk about stuff then, why would we need insecurities that couldn't be worked out?
I say briefly: Best! Useful information. Good job guys.
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